we all know that I've been going through some shit lately. . bad stuff mostly and it has affected my life as well as those around me. To start. I'd like to apologize and let you know that i need no sympathy. or raised voices. I put you all through hell. . Snuffles mostly and I love you all for being there even through my most trivial problems. now to get to th point. . This year has been SHIT. . . I've had enough with forcing my problems on every one else. and i refuse to take any sympathy for them. Recently I've gone through something that made me realize that I need just to get over it. FORGIVE AND FORGET. . . i used to know that. . and some how recently i've forgotten it. So i'm forcing myself to remember. no amount of pain i inflict on him will change the fact that it happened. . nor will it make me feel any safer. . or better about the fact that I let it happen. . so like i said. . it's almost a new year . . and this is the year i FORGIVE AND FORGET. . . .

Amp

Okay children. . what have we learned here? that when a 400 lbs man falls on top of you. . . it's not a bruised rib. . it's FRACTURED!!!! >,< ah well. . . . eventually they'll heal. . guess we'll see friday if i can still play ddr. . . but then again . . it'll take a hell of a lot more to stop me ^_^. . . . I was bored. . and i felt like complaining. . soo. . BLAH. . . I did complain. . and yesh. . . i am being a emo child ^_^ but every one deserves their one little moment of emo. . . ness. . .

Amp

Well . . . i helped clear some of the tension in the air and cleared things up between Jose and I. . . I'm glad he forgive me as easily as i forgave him. . . no more awkward moments in my head anymore. . and now i won't have this overwhelming guilt above my head because i couldn't keep my mouth shut. . . but anyhoo. . things are cleared up^_^

Amp

it hurts not to be needed. . . to be told you're not needed. . . hmmm. . . perhaps it's time i realized it and just moved on. . . maybe if i wasn't in such a cranky mood all the time i would be needed. . . but i'm dead inside. . when the batteries run dead in a flash light. .it doesn't shine. . . but you don't fret over batteries. .you just replace them. . . can't you replace my batteries too?

Amp

yesh. . i know this is the second journal today. . . but I'm bored. . and i dunno if Snuffles is on. . :sniffle: oh well. . eventually i will beat you at your own game Snuffles. . . be prepared to lose to your 5'3 best friend. . you'll rue the day you were better than me at DDR >.< and no that is not RULE >.< i'm just playin. . but i do so hope to be as wonderous at the DDR as Snuffles one day. . ^_^. . instead of a sumo wrestler in baggy pants and fishnet ^_^. . oh. . and also. . . i hope to hae the ID done soon . .wish me luck. . . ^_^. . .

Amp